My main problem with my life is in fact not a problem with myself (as many people would have guessed) but with people, or humanity.
I myself live a wonderful life with lots of joy, I’m very close to living my dream, I had a lot of luck in life as for example family, education, social situation and so on. The last big mistake I wish I hadn’t made is very long ago. I like myself, I find myself handsome, I’m happy with how I’m doing with my hobbies, only some details in my PhD studies could be improved, but it’s nothing existential. I might be worried about having kids and a family one day, and I might be a bit worried about what I’m going to do after my PhD, but I have a lot of confidence that I’ll live a decent life. And if everything fails, I can always return to my loving parents and live with them for a few weeks until I get on my feet again. So my life is great, thank you very much, fate.
And now look around you. The average student at my university (which supposedly is one of the worlds top 100) is not interested in what’s going on on the planet, is superficial and doesn’t care at all about what trouble he causes elsewhere with his lifestyle. Heck, even if he just throws the plastic wrapping of his factory-farm-ham-and-egg-sandwich which costs the planet litres of drinking water just on the ground on campus, a cleaner will come and collect it. These people aren’t grown up. And they’re supposed to be the intellectual elite! In a developed country! Now look at an uneducated chinese citizen who will consume much more than his carbon and water footprint just because he doesn’t know – there are millions of them! Look at the idiot who studies for a PhD and is nothing more than a chimpanzee trying to protect his territory of unsustainable lifestyle when it comes to such questions!
And that’s only the stupid people. Now look at the smart people who manage big companies, exploit the third world and wield massive power without being elected by anyone.
And in between a few people who have actual ideas that the earth could profit from – and they end up in blogs, in facebook statuses that get 10 likes and will be forgotten in a few days, since everybody is so incredibly busy all the time.
I ask you and actually every intelligent person:
How can we live like this and not go mad or become depressive?
By not caring. And this is the only thing I start to hate about myself. I stop to care, because there is so much to help and so little I can do. I already do the best I can for the planet with diet, with my style of consumption – but what does it help if everyone else just goes ahead and shovels a burger in his mouth while taking an air-polluting plane from London to Paris because he can’t be bothered to just pay a few pounds more for the train. And as soon as you try to say anything, people will either get angry at you or smile and not listen.
Best of luck for the future, dear planet.
Tickles to Turion's mind 